Diagnostic Insight

Sometimes when trying to diagnose a medical problem or complaint, one must use all of the experience, tack, insight, and training you can muster. Such was the case the other day when my firefighter/paramedic Mike was dispatched to a seemingly routine chest pain call at a nursing home.

Old ladies are somewhat like young children - they do some interesting things and use somewhat obscure logic on which to base their actions. This came into play as Mike tried to determine the nature of this lady's chest pain. Since some cardiac problems are brought about by exertion, he asked what she had be doing that day. "Shopping" was her short answer. After he did a bit more of the exam, he determined that her chest was actually very painful to pressure. This pretty much rules out cardiac problems as the source of the pain...and leads to muscle or skeletal issues.

So - next question he asks is "What did you buy?" thinking that she might have bought a large item like a vacuum cleaner or something that strained her ancient frame. No, she said - just a bra.

At that point, Mike summoned the staff nurse and quietly asked for her to unhook the old lady's bra in the back. Immediately, the old lady exclaims, "Wow! All my chest pain just went away!"